I was lost. I didn’t know who I was without my career. That realization felt a punch to the gut while I was walking my dog one night. My career was my identity. I have a husband whom I love very much, fantastic family and great friends but without a path professionally I felt I had lost a part of myself… a part that I hadn’t realized I’d allowed define who I was.

I left my job because I realized that I was being overworked, underpaid, and underappreciated. I was making myself miserable, busting my ass, and those who should’ve cared didn’t. It was made very clear that the higher ups would rather have someone do less for cheaper then pay someone to do the job the way it should be done. I made the decision to leave with no real idea of what was next. I decided to stand up for myself. I would respect the job I did and what I deserved even if others wouldn’t.

However, soon I found myself full of anxiety as I would get ready in the mornings. I couldn’t pinpoint the reason for this feeling. Did I make the wrong decision leaving my job? Had I acted on emotion instead of logic? It wasn’t until I was on that walk that I knew for sure I had not made the wrong choice.

I didn’t miss my old job, the hours, or the frustrations that came along with it, I was feeling lost and would have to learn to redefine that part of me. I missed knowing exactly who I was. Or at least who I thought I was. I knew walking away would be hard, but it has become both more difficult and more rewarding than I ever could have imagined.  I assumed when this all began I was simply on the path to a new job, but in reality I have been on a path to a new direction.

The continued uncertainty at times can still cause anxiety, and to be completely honest I don’t have a full view of what is next. The decision to leave my job marked the first time I have ever been uncertain about my career. That can be both terrifying and thrilling. I certainly didn’t know how to navigate all of this, but I trusted myself and the decision I made and continue to move forward with that knowledge. The uncertainty has allowed me to explore other passions that had been stifled for so long. When you don’t know what is ahead you are willing to try and explore new avenues and that is incredibly freeing. Of course the impatient part of me would like for everything to come in to view a lot quicker but I am learning I need this time. I had to rediscover my identity and learn to separate my professional success from my personal success. I had to find my own direction and move forward and not allow the fear of the unknown hold me back. I stood up for myself and walked away for a reason, I remind myself not to worry about looking back because now there is only time to discover what is ahead of me. I guess getting a little lost along the way isn’t always a bad thing after all…

Rebekah Hibbert

Rebekah Hibbert is a Certified Athletic Trainer who works on getting athletes ready for their sport and taking care of them after they are hurt.  She is passionate about women’s issues and sharing that passion through various social media outlets and is a part-time blogger trying to share her knowledge and experiences while connecting with others.